How To Send Breakup Messages Over Text (10 Useful Examples)

Breaking up with someone over text can be insensitive. However, we understand there are times when you’re simply left with no other option. 

Whatever your reason may be, you should definitely make an effort to try to make your breakup text as soft and respectful as you can- it's a question of someone’s feelings, after all. 

If you’re struggling to find the right words to send a strong and clear message that softens the blow and provides closure at the same time, don’t worry- we’re here to help! 

In this post, we share with you tips on drafting respectful and mature breakup messages unique to any form of relationship

We’ll also share ten examples of the best approaches you can use to rip the band-aid swiftly.

Now, let’s get right into it.

How To Write Respectful Breakup Messages

Here are our top three approaches (with examples) to breaking up over text while keeping the inherent awkwardness of the conversation to a minimum: 

1. Wean Off Gently

Breaking up can be quite challenging especially when it isn’t a casual relationship. If you feel that ending it all in one go would leave your partner emotionally overwhelmed, use the “wean off gently” approach. It will make the breakup more digestible for your partner by cutting up the shock down into smaller pieces, so they don’t have to take it all at once.

How does it work?

You break up slowly instead of ending it all in one swoop.

As time passes, they will begin to pick up on your hints and begin to realize that your relationship can not continue further. 

This is a good alternative to ghosting and it is considered very considerate. Here are a few notable examples of how to execute that:

• Recently I haven’t felt the same way I used to about us and I think we should take a break and figure out if this is what we still want.
• These past few [Insert time period] have been really great but now I need some space to know what I really want.
• I can’t seem to stop feeling like there are better people out there for you and me. If we continue to be together, we’ll never really know. I think we should be apart for now. I hope you understand.

2. Compliment and Detach

This is the “letting down easy” technique. 

Your relationship not working out doesn’t mean you should paint your partner a villain, sometimes, it’s simply not worth it to send a whole “thesis message” outlining why it all fell apart.

If you do that, you’re in for a lot of emotionally draining, “he said, she said,” fights.

If you want to preserve your mental peace, however, let go of the need to point out your partner’s flaws. Instead, talk about their green flags in your breakup message and simply say that despite all that’s good about them, you just don’t feel there’s compatibility in the relationship. 

And don’t worry, it’s not hard to find good things to say about them- one way to do it is to simply repeat all the good things you’ve been saying about them throughout your relationship. 

Make sure to keep the compliments simple, sincere, and significant. Otherwise, you will come across as patronizing. Here are a few ways you can do this:

• I wanted to let you know that while you’re amazing, especially at {Insert good quality}, I don’t think the two of us are a good match. Instead of wasting your time further, I would love for us to stay connected as friends.
• I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you, but I don’t see this turning into something more serious. I hope you understand. Wishing you all the best.
• I’ve had some of my best memories with you, but I think we’ve created all that we can together. I think it’s best if we don’t continue seeing each other. Take care.

3. Be Respectfully Honest

Sometimes, honestly truly is the best policy.

So, instead of beating around the bush, deliver your breakup text by letting them know the reason for the breakup. If that’s too hard, you can always hint at the reason at the very least. 

Here are some ways you can do this:

• After a few dates, I think we’re at different stages of our life. You’re focusing on {Goal} and I’m more looking to do {Goal}. I think it’s best if we go our separate ways. I hope you find someone more compatible.
• After a lot of thought, I’ve realized that we want different things out of life. It’s best if we part ways now, so we both have the chance to find what we’re looking for. Do you agree?
• This isn’t easy, but I feel like we’ve grown apart. I think it’s time for us to move on separately. I’ll always cherish the time we spent together. Can I call you to talk about this?
• I’ve been doing some serious thinking and I believe we’re not as compatible as I once thought. It’s best for both of us if we end things now. Call me when you're free.

Should You Break Up Over a Text?

Before you send that text, you need to be sure you’re making the right decision. Because once you press send, there’s no going back.

Every relationship has its ups and downs and you shouldn’t just bolt the first chance you get. But if you are ready to end it, you can do so without being tagged as the bad guy. You don’t want to look like a completely heartless person being paraded on Reddit blasts for the whole world to see. 

But if you’ve tried to work it out or you believe the red flags are unbearable, then you can use one of these breakup techniques to deliver the message gently.

What To Do After A Breakup

Breaking up is tough, no matter how you do it. But handling it with respect and honesty, even over text, shows maturity and care. 

So, what next? After delivering your breakup text, here are 3 things you should focus on doing;

• Get over them
• Pick yourself up
• Get back in the game

Unlike breaking up, if you need a little nudge to chat with the ladies again, you have a lot of help available. YourMove can help with sending suitable responses to form new relationships.