How to Talk to Girls on Tinder in 7 Easy Ways

Online dating apps like Tinder make things so much easier when it comes to approaching or talking to women. With Tinder, you don’t have to worry about gathering up the courage at a bar or park anymore, you can match with someone who is guaranteed to share at least a few interests.

However, just because Tinder makes approaching girls easier, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t put effort into your messages. On the contrary, if you want successful dates on Tinder, you will need to make sure you say the right things in the right way. Here's out top list of tips when talking to a girl on Tinder?

How to start a conversation with a girl on Tinder?

Your first impression is the most important one. And the first message you send massively effects your odds of success.

1. Send Your Message As Soon As You Match

This one is straight to the point. As soon as you match with a girl, or as soon as you see you’ve matched, send her your first message. You shouldn’t send just any message though. It needs to stand out from the others. See the rest of the tips on how you can do that.

2. Customize Your Opener Based On Her Personality/Profile

The more relatable you make your conversation starter, the more likely you will get a reply. The best way you can do that is if you check out her profile. Check out her photos, read her bio, and try to figure out what kind of person you’ll be talking to. With that information, you can then craft a message that best suits her.

3. Be Confident

You’ll often hear that confidence is key when talking to girls, and that’s true, even for Tinder. To show true confidence, you need to be forward, choose the right pickup line, and stick to it. This is how you’ll show the girl you’re interested.
But, keep in mind what we said about eagerness! It’s a fine line between confident and eager.

4. Show More Interest In Your Follow Up

So, you’ve landed your opening line and you even got a response. Great! But, what now? Well, this part is just as important as everything else that came before. This is when you will need to show more interest, i.e. find ways to tell the girl that you like her.
One of the best ways you can do that is either by asking her the right questions, or by giving her compliments. But, don’t push it too much, respect her boundaries and don’t get too personal with the questions.

5. Don’t Wait Too Long To Ask Her On A Date

If your opener worked, you got a reply and you both clicked then don’t wait too long to ask her on a date. Use this momentum and ask her out on a date for the next weekend!

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What Are the Biggest Mistakes Guys Make When Talking to Girls on Tinder?

Before we can start talking about what you should do when talking to girls on Tinder, we’ll need to cover what you shouldn’t. Here are some of the most common errors, and unfortunately also the largest!

Sound Too Desperate

Guys often start out too eager when talking to girls on Tinder, and that can be a real mood killer. This whole process of connecting with somebody is two-sided, and both parties need to be equally interested for it to end up on a date. Being too eager might come off as desperate, which is something a lot of women avoid, especially on Tinder.
You of course need to show interest in the girl, but don’t spam her with multiple messages or demand a reply. With those moves you’ll end up either ghosted or blocked.

Talk Too Much About Themselves

This is a problem that a lot of people have, not just guys on dating apps. It’s just that people love talking about themselves. However, this can quickly get boring for your match, and they might feel like you’re simply not interested in getting to know them. So, instead of rambling about yourself, consider doing the opposite. More on that later!

Send The Wrong Opening Line

Another huge mistake guys make when messaging girls on Tinder is they send the wrong opening line. Of course, your opening line isn’t as important as having a solid bio on Tinder, but it still affects whether you get a reply or not. So, consider improving your conversation starter.

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How to respond if you get ghosted?

No reply to your first message

If your match doesn’t reply, it’s not the end of the world. People get busy, distracted, or just miss messages. Wait a bit and then send a light-hearted follow-up.
Example: "I guess my last message got lost in the Tinderverse! How's your day going?"

One Word Replies

One-word answers can be soul-crushing, but don’t give up hope just yet. Try to reignite the conversation with an interesting question or a playful comment.
Example: "Wow, I see you're a person of few words! What's the most exciting thing you've done this week?"

Ghosting

Ghosting happens to the best of us. It's a natural part of online dating. The key is not to take it personally. If someone vanishes, give them space and move on. Learn more about managing ghosting and other common online dating challenges in our ultimate online dating guide.
Example: "Looks like you’ve been abducted by aliens. If you return to Earth, drop me a message!"

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How to ask out a girl on Tinder?

Timing is everything. Wait until you've built a bit of rapport. If she’s responding with enthusiasm, laughing at your jokes, and sharing details about her life, you’re golden. If she’s giving one-word replies, maybe hold off.

Be playful yet clear when suggesting a date. You don't need to write a Shakespearean soliloquy. Something simple works wonders.
Example: "You seem like a lot of fun. How about we grab a coffee and see if we can make each other laugh in person?"

Specificity is your friend. Avoid vague plans like "We should hang out sometime." Nail down a time and place. This shows you’re serious and not just throwing out a half-hearted invite.
Example: "There's this cool rooftop bar I've been wanting to check out. How about we go there on Friday at 7?"

For more tips on how to effectively suggest dates and move from chatting to meeting up, you can check out our guide on effective texting strategies. This guide emphasizes the importance of prompt, engaging first messages and using texting as a tool to set up dates effectively.

Confirm details to show reliability. It’s like setting up a mission in a spy movie, minus the explosions. Mention the day, time, and place again, so there’s no room for confusion.
Example: "Friday at 7 PM at Sky Lounge? I’ll be the one with the smile and maybe a hint of nerves."

Keep it light and positive. A playful tone can ease any tension and make the idea of meeting up more appealing.
Example: "I'll bring my best jokes, you bring your best smile. Deal?"

Suggesting a date should feel like a natural step forward, not a pressure-filled ultimatum.

FAQs

What should I do if I run out of things to say?

• Don’t stress about running out of things to say. This is a person you’ve just met, so there are probably hundreds of things you could share with each other, you just can’t remember anything in that moment.
• Ask her anything! Ask her about what she does in her free time. Her hobbies, her interests, her skills, etc.
• Ask her about where she’s from, or where she wants to go.
• Since you’re probably in the same geographic area, ask about restaurants she likes or adventures she’s had.
• If you can’t come up with anything, you can always rely on our Chat Assistant to come up clutch when you most need it!

Can I reuse the same opening lines or questions with different matches?

Of course! There is nothing wrong with reusing your best opening line with different matches. If it works, then why not, right? However, if you’ve noticed that you’re not getting a lack of responses once you send your opening line, it might be a good idea to find a better opener.

Conclusion

By keeping in mind both the mistakes you need to avoid and the tips that will help you start talking with girls on Tinder, you’re bound to get a bunch of replies that might turn into dates.

If you feel like you need a bit more practice, consider checking out our blog. Or, you can trust our Dating Assistant - YourMove, to do the heavy lifting for you!